The Problems With Brothers
by amba gurl
Summary: Seriously, just because she has boobs doesn't mean she can't kick your ass. And no, that does not mean she wants to sleep with you! Fem!Ace fic, because I love the WB pirates... and Ace looks gorgeous as a girl...
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N Short chapter to start - obviously the first time they meet ace. Hope you like :)**_

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"You think you can defeat me, child? You're a century too early," Whitebeard chuckled, grinning at the wavering boy in front of him.

"I don't care! I'm gonna defeat you, you wrinkly old bastard!" the scrawny boy yelled, glaring at Whitebeard. He raised his fists, took a deep breath, and ran at the pirate.

Barely lifting his arm, the Yonko intercepted his attack and knocked him flying.

"Gurarararara!" Whitebeard laughed, "Come now, boy! You've great spirit. Join me! Be my son," the old pirate offered, watching as the boy tried to stand up. "You won't defeat me; you may as well give -"

"Shut the hell up, geezer," the boy gasped, interrupting him. The glare the youth sent him was cold as ice.

Whitebeard blinked, startled. Then he grinned. "You impudent little brat. Wanna say that again?"

"Shut. The hell. Up. Asshole." The boy growled, staggering to his feet. He wavered, and then dug his bare feet into the sand.

Whitebeard laughed. "Check out this kid, boys," he called to the watching pirates, taking his eyes off of the youth to speak to his sons. He grinned as they laughed and jostled each other, enjoying the one sided fight.

"Hey, don't ignore me, bastard!" the kid yelled, launching himself at the captain, fists ablaze. Sighing, Whitebeard swatted the boy again, slamming his fist into his chest. He blinked at the high pitched squeal that erupted from the youth, who rolled to a stop a few dozen yards away. Whitebeard grumbled, strolling closer to the curled up form.

"Kid, you really need to watch that temper of yours," Whitebeard chuckled, crouching down and eyeing the dazed child in front of him. He offered a hand, "Come on, be my son."

"G-go ta hell, b-b-bastard," he stuttered, coughing. He groaned and curled up, shielding his chest.

"Now, boy, don't be so stubborn," Whitebeard said, eyes softening slightly as he watching the kid tremble.

"S-shut up. 'M not a boy, d-dumbass," the kid growled, before she passed out.

Whitebeard paused, staring at the boy – no, girl, in the sand. Well, he'd always wanted more daughters.

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_**A/N What'd you think? All I can think is oh my god punch to boobies... Anyways, I have never read a good fem!Ace fic, that has no real romantic interests. This is gonna be pretty gen, more a thing I write when I'm in the mood... I might have Luffy and Sabo in it at some point, maybe GB maybe not. **_

_**Anyways, review please!**_


	2. Chapter 2

**_A/N Four reviews in the first day! Damn guys, didn't think this would be that popular. Here's another chapter - I was gonna update later but you made me smile :D_**

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Ace yawned, blinking slowly, dazed eyes staring at the small porthole across from her bed. Groaning in annoyance, the rolled over to escape the light, hissing in pain at the pressure on her chest. Grumbling, she reached up and pressed her palm to her chest, heating it to a steady warmth that spread through her chest. Sighing in relief, she snuggled back into the bunk, relishing in the soft blankets.

_...wait, what?_

Eyes snapping open, Ace bolted upright, glaring fiercely around the cabin. Barely a second passed before she yelped and curled into herself, shaking at the waves of pain rolling through her body.

_Damn, I feel like I went ten rounds with Gramps, _she mused, forcing herself to focus and spread soothing warmth throughout her body, dulling the sharp pain. Trembling slightly, she lifted her head, shoving her dark hair off her face. Looking around, she noted she was in a rather small cabin, made of a strange dark wood she didn't recognise. _Where the hell am I...?_

_Well, there's no point panicking_, she thought. _Maybe some farmer or pervert picked me up... would explain why I'm not wearing my chest binder..._she huffed in annoyance, glancing down at the freed breasts, scarcely noticeable beneath the baggy top –that was not hers. She scowled. _Bastards better not have done anything, or I'll kill him._

Ace pulled back the blankets and swung her legs off the bed, then gradually shifted her weight and pulled herself upright. Leaning on the wall for support she moved carefully to the door, swearing softly at her unsteady legs. The girl grinned as she reached the door, leaning forward and grabbing the handle. Pushing open the door Ace exited the cabin and found herself in a short hallway. It was completely deserted. Frowning slightly she turned left and headed towards some stairs. Sat the top of the stairs, which took her longer to climb than she was willing to admit, was another door, this time a sliding one. Slowly sliding the door open, she slipped outside and froze, startled at what was before her.

A huge ship was spread out in front of her. Crewman dotted the deck here and there, socializing, sparring, and there was a few who actually looked like they were bowling. And smack bang in the middle of the deck the mast rose, sails unfurled and proudly displaying the jolly roger of the Whitebeard pirates.

A cold feeling spread through Ace's chest, freezing her to the spot as she stared at the flag in horror.

"SHIT!"

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"I think our visitor's awake, Pops," Marco said lazily, leaning against the captain's chair. He rolled his eyes at the mischievous expression on the Yonko's face. "I still don't get why you brought her aboard, yoi."

"She's an impatient, reckless, impudent little brat, isn't she?" Newgate said happily, grinning at his first son.

Marco sighed, feeling his eye twitch in annoyance at his father's carefree tone. "That's reason enough not to have her here. Those are all pretty bad qualities."

Newgate tutted, glancing at the small figure on the other side of the deck. "Now Marco, she's only a child. If she's going to be a part of the family she'll have to have spirit. Don't be a mean big brother."

Marco blinked at him, and then shrugged, accepting that his captain's mind was set. They both paused and turned to listen at the sudden influx of cursing. Marco listened thoughtfully, noting the various inflections and languages peppered through the spiel.

"If you say so Pops. But I don't think she'll be too happy with that. But damn if she hasn't already got the mouth of a sailor." Marco smirked at the look of consternation on his father's face as they listened to the constant swearing.

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**_A/N So what did you think? Bit of a filler chapter but it sets the grounds for the next couple, and shows that I pretty much have Ace normal - except with lady bits ;) . Style is gonna be sort of short story to start with, then a bunch of one shots. _**

**_Review please!_**


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